Nothing says Romance better then Roses, Chocolates, and Candlelight.
Women love to be wined and dined. In fact, we love receiving flowers and chocolates so much that over 58 million pounds of chocolate, and over 198 million roses are sold just for Valentine’s Day. Total amount spent thus far for Valentine’s Day is over $19 billion.
WOW! Crazy statistics. Valentine’s Day is touted as the most romantic day of the year. It’s a nice reminder to be encouraged to have a little romance in your relationship.
So, what do you do about the other 364 days of the year besides race to and fro, doing the gazillion things on your to do list? Some moms are so busy they don’t even have time to write a to do list.
Siri and Alexa never seem to get it right, and most of the time they only lead to frustration. How odd it is to be irritated with a device…LOL!
Thank goodness for reminders and alarms. I would certainly be lost without them, and I don’t have little ones running around at my feet.
It takes more then some passionate or romantic moments to get the flame started. I have been reading a great book Every Woman’s Marriage (which I highly recommend). I actually bought a copy for one of my daughters that is newly married.
For you ‘over the top busy’ MOM, check it out on Audible, so that you can listen to it while making that romantic candlelight dinner, while working on the wash, and while changing your twins’ diapers for the 8th time in one day. LOL!
Seriously, just listening, reading part of one chapter here and there will help that mind-connection moment that I was talking about in the Passion blog.
So, to help you out here’s a few suggestions to gain some insight into helping your Romance spark again.
When men were polled for this book, Every Women’s Marriage, the numero uno thing that men most wanted was what James Taylor sang about:
Whenever I see your smiling face
I have to smile myself
Because I love you (Yes, I do)
(Check out the song on Youtube)
Be aware of the fact that “a man’s self-esteem is wrapped up in the how good of a husband, father, provider, friend, and lover he is. When we are not making the grade and we see disappointment on our wife’s face as a result, it’s like looking into the mirror, seeing the loser we always feared of becoming”. (EWM, p. 110)
Daily tips to bring the romance back to your relationship
Taking time for you MOM is what’s important to begin with. Because if you’re not breathing, reflecting and taking care of yourself there won’t be anything left for your most precious members of your family.
I know I always talk about breathing, but it is amazing when you discover how often you actually hold your breath or breathe very shallow.
2. Practice smiling.
The more you smile the happier you feel.
Haha … I know this is an odd suggestion too! There is a facial exercise where if you press you lips together in a small round circle out as far as you can, then bring your lips and cheeks back in an exaggerated ‘WOW”, it will actually strengthen those smile muscles.
This can be done while driving. Who cares what the person next to you is thinking! Just flash them a big smile. It might make their day. You can practice this with your children too, which will probably bring lots of giggles, brightening up everyone’s day.
3. Don’t worry be happy!
Yes, Bobby McFerrin’s song, Don’t worry, Be Happy, is not only a fun song to listen to and sing along; it is a jewel of truth. You are probably more familiar with Bob Marley’s version, check it out on Youtube.
Don’t worry, be happy
‘Cause when you worry your face will frown
And that will bring everybody down
So don’t worry, be happy
My other favorite is Red Red Wine …hahaha! (That always works too!)
Happiness is a choice. It sometimes takes a ton of effort and when you breathe deeply you can think about the things that make you happy and strive to think and do what makes you and you husband happy.
4. Put on that lipstick!
Tell Alexa to play love songs, light some candles, spritz a little perfume or a lot depending on your day. Dim the lights (this is really handy especially if all the chores you set out to do didn’t get done).
I remember teaching a seminar about Hospitality to a precious group of moms of young children. About two years later a young woman stopped me as I was getting into my car, and she said that she took what I said to heart.
She always tries to do this even if the evening turns south with a sick feverish child or the mood is not quite right. She says it makes her happy, which puts a smile on her face and makes her husband happy too!
5. Creative Romance
I SO know how life can suck you into a storm that you cannot even think about a date, let alone know what to wear. Then there’s that irritating budget that hovers above your head.
First of all, you cannot ignore the Romance in your relationship. It is a MUST DO!!!
Your marriage WILL NOT survive without Passion and Romance.
Believe me, I have been married for over three decades. Sadly, I have watched the cares of life and the raising of children choke out the life of my girlfriends’ marriages. (And threaten my own relationship!)
Mom you need to be a WIFE, to enjoy the fullness of Passion and Romance. It’s not just about the “Husband and his needs”.
YOU need Passion, Romance, Physical Touch and Closeness!
And, with all the things you already do, this needs to be near the top of the list. You will find that you will enjoy it and will actually crave it as you did early on in your relationship.